Since school has been out, I have been teaching Harrison and Hazel how to play the piano again. I've also been working with them on the viola and violin. I have a hard time paying for music lessons when most of the things they would be learning I could teach them myself. I find that when I teach my kids, I have to go in a different mode, and I also have to do things differently for each one.
For Hazel, I have to be super ultra positive about everything. She has a really difficult time if I just tell her what to fix. (hmm....sounds like me....)
Harrison is good at taking what I say and applying it.
On the piano this will be the third year I have attempted to teach them. :) Maybe four where Harrison is concerned. Still, this year has gone much better than the other years that I tried. I think a lot of it has to do with the music class they've had at school. Now I am just building on what they have already learned.
I think my style of teaching music has a lot to do with proper technique, musicianship, and theory. You would think that all teachers teach this way but they don't.
Harrison is advanced enough on the viola, that I wouldn't mind having him take lessons from an actual viola teacher. Still, much of what he'd be learning, I teach him.
This summer has been very encouraging though. Hazel is doing really well, and I think we might even finish a book and start on level two before the summer is out. That is exciting stuff!! It is very invigorating to see my kids starting to progress in music, especially on the piano. I love it!
It is also nice to have something that they can work on every day.
It's been an interesting spring. Remember when I wrote about how my son is in the local youth chamber orchestra and how I missed playing? Then I wrote about how much I have enjoyed playing my cello lately...
Anyway, the youth chamber orchestra usually has a "specialist" for each section of strings. Imagine my surprise and outright shock when they called me and asked me if I would like to be the cello string specialist for the chamber orchestra. I seriously had no words! I told them that I wasn't as good as the previous cello specialist, and they told me that was ok. So, after a discussion with Shane (who literally was looking at me like, "why are we discussing this, and why aren't you on the phone telling them that you'll do it?!") So, of course I accepted.
I admit a huge part of me keeps wondering when they will figure it out and realize they made a mistake in asking me.
I guess that's one of my biggest issues. Feeling like people are always thinking I play terrible. I know they don't. I know that unless I play a squeaky high note, most people are just amazed that I play an instrument and think it's super cool!
So, playing with that group has been really fun.
Then I have my two cello students (yep, you read that right, TWO) and honestly I am ok that there are just two. It's been an adventure since one of them is young. Nine years old. And that has been really interesting. Who knew that my primary teaching skills would come in handy teaching a nine year old?! Not me.
Add to that my part time library job which I love, and 98% of the time my music doesn't even interfere with it.
Plus a spring concert with the local community orchestra which I also play in, and rehearsals for that, and they are playing some difficult music...as in, I haven't played music this difficult since I was in college, so that has been an adventure!
Plus kids, school, preschool, and everything else.
Equals a very packed schedule. At least what feels like one to me. It's an enjoyable busy though. Not a stressful one most of the time, and that is the key ingredient right?
An added bonus is that playing the cello is good physical therapy for my hands, and that is definitely a great thing.
If I didn't have to worry about my kids ruining my bow or touching my strings where the bridge is, which is bad, and also right about the height of their hands, then I would probably be playing it more.
On top of which, it's not just playing it...it's practicing and getting things to sound right, and having good fingerings. I haven't ever just wanted to practice my cello. EVER. Now, I do.
Like, right now, I want to be playing it, but I can't, because I need to keep Emmett and Jeffrey from destroying the house.
Apparently when I cleared all the negative junk from my chakras, a huge chunk of that was all the critical negative things that went with playing music. I know that was a while ago, but here I am, wanting to play my cello again.
I don't know if I can fully explain what a miracle that is. How burned out I was on all things musical. How even preparing for a concert was painful. It was a love/hate relationship of wanting to play the music, but not wanting to. That is all gone now. I'm even contemplating joining a community orchestra farther away from where I live because they perform more often. THEY PERFORM MORE OFTEN.
Do you know how crazy that sounds to me? Me, who even doing just one concert a year was adequate. Me, who for the past three years...nothing. Granted, I had good excuses. I just had a baby. I've been really sick. Things are just too crazy. But then there's this year. I had surgery, and I can't even carry my cello to rehearsals because it weighs too much, and I am still dedicated and wanting to do it! My son carries my cello case for me because I can't.
It doesn't even bother me that my hands don't work the way they used to. Well...okay, it bothers me but not in a, I should never play the cello again kind of way, but more of a, I'm going to play the cello as long as I can kind of way.
Now I just need to save up and buy some new strings.... (that doesn't sound like that big of a deal until you realize that the strings I like cost about 400-500 a set for some new ones.)
I think I have been slacking in the kid information department for a while. This is probably because I write the most stuff about them in my hard copy journal, and all the funny things they do I write on facebook, so I forget to write about it on here.
Harrison is getting ready to have a birthday. It's hard to believe that he is turning 14. That just makes me feel really old! Still, he has accomplished a lot. He started playing the viola in 5th grade. If I had been on top of things, I would have helped him practice and given him musicianship lessons. He would be a lot farther a long. :) Still, he is doing really well. This summer I worked really hard with him to achieve his goal of being in the the local youth chamber orchestra, and he made it in. It has been a lot of work for him, but he really enjoys it, and it is so cool to hear him play and becoming a good viola player.
He is also amazing at building things with his legos and bionicles. When he first gets a set he will follow the instructions and build the set, but after that....his brain is his set of instructions. He has built some pretty amazing things, just by looking at the pieces and then deciding what he wants to make. This first started when he was four and built a tyrannasaurus rex out of his duplo blocks.
I keep hoping that he continues to be the great son that he is. In many ways it is very spoiling for me because he is such a good teenager. Like all teenagers he has his days, but for the most part I can't complain.
It is interesting to look at his baby pictures and see how much Emmett looks like him. There are a few pictures where he looks like Jeffrey. This is especially interesting because everyone, on both sides of the family thought Emmett was his own look and didn't look anything like any of the other kids. I always just thought you could see more of my side of the family in him, where the other kids just looked a lot like Shane's side of the family.
My world has been a bit eclectic lately, so I felt like the title fit well.
It's kind of interesting to post something about surgery, especially the surgery I am getting prepared to have. Prior to getting pregnant with Jeffrey I had a diagnostic lap surgery where they were going to remove a growth from my uterus. Before that I had struggled for seven years to get pregnant at all. I got pregnant once in that time, but I miscarried. It was a rough time. When I had that surgery it was discovered that I had endometriosis. BAD endometriosis. It was stage 3 which is one of the higher levels of endometriosis. Knowing what I know now, I realize what a miracle it was that I became pregnant with Harrison and Hazel at all. I consider it a huge blessing that I didn't feel or experience the level of pain that most women feel with this condition.
So, during that surgery, they cleaned out the endometriosis the best they could. My cycles after I had Jeffrey were heavy but not bad, and more regular than they had been for a long time. This would probably explain why I was able to become pregnant with Emmett and had him when Jeffrey was 17 months old.
Well, now things are terrible again. The hormones, the mood swings, the PMS, the bleeding, the cramps, etc... etc... it is awful. Every time my period comes, is not a great thing. It's hard on me, it's hard on my family, and I am always relieved when it goes away again.
We decided that it was time. So I am preparing to have a hysterectomy. I am having it done all laparascopic which I think is pretty cool. The doctor I go to specializes in doing this type of procedure and was trained by one of the best surgeons in the country. He is also very fast. I asked him how long he thought it would take and he told me the hysterectomy portion would probably take an hour.
I know that probably sounds like a long time to people who have never assisted on surgery, but I've assisted on lots of hysterectomies and that's super fast! Even a surgeon who is really good at doing vaginal hysterectomies usually takes 2-2 1/2 hours.
Laparascopic surgeries usually take longer anyway, because they are being done with a scope. So, an hour is pretty amazing.
Of course, I will be having my endometriosis cleaned out as well, so that will probably add another hour to the surgical time.
I feel at peace with it. That among many other things lets me know it is a good choice to make.
I think I wrote previously about how my CMT (charcot-marie-toothe) syndrome is getting worse. I am sure that eventually I will have to get an official diagnosis from a neurologist just to say that yes, it has been scientifically diagnosed, but it is quite obvious that I have an active form of it. I have been trying to keep the muscles I have working, especially in my hands, but my right hand has really been acting up lately. My fingers kind of spasm and wont' move correctly.
That makes me kind of sad, but, oh well. It is something I will have to get used to dealing with.
At least I can always enjoy music with my ears or even memories at the very least.
And with that, here is one of my favorite songs, Absolutely breathtaking, sung by Alfie Boe. I hope you will take the time to listen.
I always remember singing. I remember sitting on the living room floor looking at one of the music books we had for children, and just singing. I started playing the piano when I was 8. Then when I was 11 I started the clarinet. When I was 13 I had begged and pleaded with my mom long enough (3 years) and convinced her I wanted to learn how to play the cello.
Music was a huge chunk of my life. It probably shouldn't be any surprise that I chose to initially major in music when I first went to college.
Then things changed. I don't know if it was reaching my threshold of being criticized... an all-time ultimate feeling of being inadequate... or maybe it was having my dreams crushed by someone whose opinion I held very dear.... maybe that was it. Regardless, I got burned out to a point where I almost convinced Shane to sell my cello. (Well, not really, I don't think he ever would have sold it.)
Now I have two of my kids playing stringed instruments. Over the summer I started teaching them to play the piano, and I also monitored my son on his viola practice. While I would love to be able to have them both in piano lessons, and violin and viola lessons...yeah, it's not going to happen. I decided I needed to reach outside the box and try to teach them music. Surprisingly it has gone pretty well. Teaching your own kids is hard, but I figured if mom's all over the world can homeschool their kids, then I can teach them music.
An interesting thing has happened though....
My desire to create music and play, has started to come back. My son is auditioning for a youth chamber orchestra and I am so excited for him! Then my friend posted auditions for the youth symphony, and I was wishing that I could play with them!
It even motivated me to get my cello out and play it. This is something that sadly I haven't done for a few years. It was so refreshing and rejuvinating! It has really made me miss the music world that I used to be a part of. I am looking forward to playing in the Messiah sing along this year.
The music in me is starting to come alive again...it's a good feeling.
So, it's kind of fun working at the library because I see all kinds of books come through, and when one catches my eye I check it out for myself to read it. Of course, I still find other books too, when I'm not working.
One such book "Bringing Elizabeth Home" which is about when Elizabeth Smart was kidnapped, written from the perspective of her parents, was one that I had always intended to read, and then just didn't for whatever reason. Since it was available, I checked it out, and then put myself on the hold list for the one written by Elizabeth Smart that came out this past year.
Anyway, as I was reading it, they quoted a part of a book written by Spencer W Kimball called, "Faith Precedes the Miracle," (which I also want to read!)
"Some reservoirs are to store water. Some are to store food. There should also be reservoirs of knowledge to meet future needs; reservoirs of courage to overcome the floods of fear that put uncertainty in lives; reservoirs of stamina; and reservoirs of faith--especially reservoirs of faith--so that when the world presses upon us, we stand firm and strong; when the temptations of a decaying world about us draw upon our energies, sap our spiritual vitality, and seek to pull us down, we need a storage of faith that can carry us over the dull, difficult, terrifying moments, disappointments, disillusionments and adversity, want, confusion, and frustration."
When I read that quote, it made me pause for a moment and think about my own reservoir of faith... how full is it? What do I need to do to fill it up further?
It is something that I am still thinking about as I contemplate ways I can improve. Then as my mind traveled over songs that I knew, the one that came to mind was this one: The Light Divine
I have always been one that seems to feel the Spirit most strongly when listening to music. When I was younger, it was hymns that helped me gain a testimony of Jesus Christ. It was religious music that told me and helped me gain an understanding that I am a daughter of God, and that I am loved.
So, it is no surprise to me, that hymns seem to help me still in times when I feel sorrow, in times when I long for peace, and in times when I pause to reflect on things in my life.
This hymn, however, is one that I always think of as bringing pure light and sunshine to my soul. Rejoice! What a positive word that is. Rejoice the Lord is King!
It make my heart light and brings a smile to my face. Then, to listen to it with music...pure bliss.
In Psalms 32:11 we read: Be glad in theLord, and rejoice, ye righteous: and shout for joy, allye that areupright in heart. The words to the hymn were written by Charles Wesley, who was an English leader of the Methodist movement. I love the words:
1. Rejoice, the Lord is King! Your Lord and King adore! Mortals, give thanks and sing And triumph evermore.
[Chorus] Lift up your heart! Lift up your voice! Rejoice, again I say, rejoice! Lift up your heart! Lift up your voice! Rejoice, again I say, rejoice!
2. The Lord, the Savior, reigns, The God of truth and love. When he had purged our stains, He took his seat above.
3. His kingdom cannot fail; He rules o'er earth and heav'n. The keys of death and hell To Christ the Lord are giv'n.
To me, this is such a positive and inspirational hymn of hope and light. "His kingdom cannot fail:" In some ways the words are so simple, but they bring such cheerfulness to my heart. They remind me why I have a testimony of Jesus Christ, why I believe he is the Savior for us all, and why we have hope that we can return to be with our Heavenly Father again.
Harrison was very excited to play with the 5th grade orchestra this year. I was excited too. I still am. :)
Last night was their first performance. It was a Christmas concert. They sounded SO GOOD! They only played one song, and they have only played for two months, so all things considered, I was very impressed. The other groups sounded good too.
They had the 8th, 9th, and high school orchestras play songs, as well as percussion ensemble, jazz, and high school bands play.
It has been so long since I have been to a concert that included all these different groups. I thought it was very enjoyable, and they all sounded good.
Jeffrey enjoyed watching the band groups perform a lot. Who knows, maybe he will be in band when he gets older. It certainly wouldn't surprise me. :)
One thing that I found kind of funny though... Harrison's orchestra teacher had told them that she wanted them to wear Christmas colors if they had them in "nice clothes." I of course knew that she meant dressier clothing that you would wear to church. (I've been doing this how many years now?) Harrison was convinced that he would be just fine in his green Webelo's woods t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers. Yeah, that didn't fly. I told him she meant church clothes with a tie in Christmas colors. He wasn't sure about that, but I think he was glad I made him change when we got to the concert and everyone else performing was dressed nicely too. :)
Last night was the second performance of the Messiah. This year we performed it in a Catholic church. The people that go there I think tried really hard to make us feel welcome. Maybe that means they want us to come back next year? I don't know for sure but either way it was nice of them.
I took Harrison and Hazel with me and I thought they did really well. I made sure they both brought books that they like to read in case they got bored.
I think it was an interesting experience for them because they have never been in a church that wasn't of our religion. Not that it was extremely different but there were some differences.
The performance itself was interesting since we hadn't ever played there before and then the conductor threw in some songs that we hadn't rehearsed and I don't think any of us had played for years. That was pretty exciting...then add to that a soloist we had never rehearsed with...yeah.... that song did not go that well. I can honestly say it sounded pretty terrible. There was one point in the song that the organ was the only one playing and the conductor was quietly calling out rehearsal letters to us... you know it's bad when EVERYONE is lost. On the plus side the soloist just kept going and she did have a pretty voice. : )
So I have to say that our first performance was definitely better than this one. Still...there is nothing quite like hearing the Hallelujah chorus sung in full choir and symphony in a church setting and that song sounded AWESOME.
My kids got to experience a concert too, and I guess in a way that made it more worth it than anything.
I can't get The Messiah out of my head...namely the chorus "Surely He Hath Born Our Griefs." It is one of my favorite choruses, so, not annoying...I just have a symphony and choir singing in my brain all day.
I even posted it so if you really want, you can get it stuck in your brain too.. ;)
This version is okay, there are others I like better but you get the idea.
It's that time again...the time where I sit here and really want to write something, and yet, nothing comes to mind. Do you want to read about all my surgical ventures? Probably not so much, and it gets tricky when I can't talk about anything specifically because of all the hippaa stuff.
I feel like these days my time consists of...get up, go to work, come home, make dinner, read a bedtime story, put kids to bed, and then repeat. It's made even more repetative and lonely when I never get to see Shane. Well, it feels like never. At least I get to kiss him goodbye in the morning and see him on the weekend and I can barely handle that. Meaning that I miss my hubby!!!
We keep hoping he will be put on the graveyard shift at least sometime soon, since day shift is next to impossible to get on. Plus, it really wouldn't help in the childcare dept especially for summer. Still, I am glad that we both have jobs and we are at least trying to get on top of our finances. It is encouraging to know that we have at least made some progress.
Hmm a story from my past maybe? Well, maybe a lesson learned. It's kind of interesting how we learn certain things. For example, I learned very early on in my teenage years that I could not handle being in a marriage with someone who played the same instrument as me. Isn't that funny? I remember, every time I liked a guy who played the instrument I did or he liked me, it just didn't go well.
I look at my marriage to Shane and I am so grateful for it. We get along so well. We don't have the disagreements that seem to plague most marriages. We like a lot of the same things, but we have our own interests too. Shane likes guns, me, not so much. He likes to snowmobile, ski, and other things. Me, not so much. I guess it's important to have opposite interests and similar interests. We think a lot alike, and while our personalities are different, we have a lot of similarities too. I guess the most wonderful thing about being married to Shane is that I enjoy being married to him, and it doesn't feel like work to do it. It can't get better than that!
