It's been an interesting week. Physically it's been fine. Better than I expected really. It has been hard to not do too much and try and rest as much as I should, but other than that I can't complain.
One of the things I wondered about before I had my surgery, was how I would feel emotionally afterward.
Well.... for me it has been very similar to how I felt whenever I had a baby. Crazy. Hormones everywhere, crying, emotional, etc... that has been interesting to deal with. It has gotten better as the week has progressed though.
I guess a lot of women feel a sense of emptiness, especially if they had this surgery before they were able to have any kids. I haven't really felt that, but then, I have kids, and I am content with our family. :) I did think and pray long and hard about whether we were really "done" or if there was one more that was supposed to come to our family, but I decided, well, we decided, that it was okay. Four is a good number.
There were also concerns about if I did get pregnant again, how that would affect my health, and whether or not it would be a good risk to take. It's an understandable concern...I mean, I don't think I've had one pregnancy where I didn't end up on bed rest at the end. With each baby it got worse too, so I definitely took this all into account.
There were many times I wondered if I should wait just because Emmett and Jeffrey are so young, and it would be difficult to care for them while I was healing. Then, every time my body would decide to have a cycle, it was just horrible. I know I've written about that before, but seriously, it was awful. Six weeks didn't seem to be that long of a time frame...actually that is about how long apart my cycles were becoming...
So, interesting things about my surgery...
I thought there would be a lot of endometriosis. There was hardly any. I think my doctor was surprised about that too, since the last time I had surgery for endometriosis I had no clue I even had it and I was at a stage III (which is really bad).
I think, if I remember right, (I will probably find out at my follow up appointment in 5 weeks) he felt afterward that the pain could have been from the adhesions I had from my last c-section, and that he could see why I was having issues, because of the condition of my uterus. It makes me wonder if they cut it open to look at the inside. (Too descriptive? Sorry...)
I thought my ovaries would be borderline on needing to be removed. They looked normal. NORMAL. They didn't even look polycystic. That definitely surprised me. I was extremely grateful, but definitely surprised. So, we'll have to see about the whole PCOS thing.
So, I don't really question whether or not I did the right thing. Right after I had surgery, even though I was in pain, I felt physically better. It reminded me of how I felt after I had my gallbladder removed. I just felt better, like something that was making me sick was gone. That's the best way I can describe it.
Hopefully I will continue to heal well, and things will continue to get better. I still have no idea how I am going to take care of my little boys when Shane goes back to work, but we'll just have to take it a day at a time I suppose. Maybe a solution will present itself. :)
Showing posts with label endometriosis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label endometriosis. Show all posts
Friday, October 17, 2014
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Surgeries, Health, and Music
My world has been a bit eclectic lately, so I felt like the title fit well.
It's kind of interesting to post something about surgery, especially the surgery I am getting prepared to have. Prior to getting pregnant with Jeffrey I had a diagnostic lap surgery where they were going to remove a growth from my uterus. Before that I had struggled for seven years to get pregnant at all. I got pregnant once in that time, but I miscarried. It was a rough time. When I had that surgery it was discovered that I had endometriosis. BAD endometriosis. It was stage 3 which is one of the higher levels of endometriosis. Knowing what I know now, I realize what a miracle it was that I became pregnant with Harrison and Hazel at all. I consider it a huge blessing that I didn't feel or experience the level of pain that most women feel with this condition.
So, during that surgery, they cleaned out the endometriosis the best they could. My cycles after I had Jeffrey were heavy but not bad, and more regular than they had been for a long time. This would probably explain why I was able to become pregnant with Emmett and had him when Jeffrey was 17 months old.
Well, now things are terrible again. The hormones, the mood swings, the PMS, the bleeding, the cramps, etc... etc... it is awful. Every time my period comes, is not a great thing. It's hard on me, it's hard on my family, and I am always relieved when it goes away again.
We decided that it was time. So I am preparing to have a hysterectomy. I am having it done all laparascopic which I think is pretty cool. The doctor I go to specializes in doing this type of procedure and was trained by one of the best surgeons in the country. He is also very fast. I asked him how long he thought it would take and he told me the hysterectomy portion would probably take an hour.
I know that probably sounds like a long time to people who have never assisted on surgery, but I've assisted on lots of hysterectomies and that's super fast! Even a surgeon who is really good at doing vaginal hysterectomies usually takes 2-2 1/2 hours.
Laparascopic surgeries usually take longer anyway, because they are being done with a scope. So, an hour is pretty amazing.
Of course, I will be having my endometriosis cleaned out as well, so that will probably add another hour to the surgical time.
I feel at peace with it. That among many other things lets me know it is a good choice to make.
I think I wrote previously about how my CMT (charcot-marie-toothe) syndrome is getting worse. I am sure that eventually I will have to get an official diagnosis from a neurologist just to say that yes, it has been scientifically diagnosed, but it is quite obvious that I have an active form of it. I have been trying to keep the muscles I have working, especially in my hands, but my right hand has really been acting up lately. My fingers kind of spasm and wont' move correctly.
That makes me kind of sad, but, oh well. It is something I will have to get used to dealing with.
At least I can always enjoy music with my ears or even memories at the very least.
And with that, here is one of my favorite songs, Absolutely breathtaking, sung by Alfie Boe. I hope you will take the time to listen.
It's kind of interesting to post something about surgery, especially the surgery I am getting prepared to have. Prior to getting pregnant with Jeffrey I had a diagnostic lap surgery where they were going to remove a growth from my uterus. Before that I had struggled for seven years to get pregnant at all. I got pregnant once in that time, but I miscarried. It was a rough time. When I had that surgery it was discovered that I had endometriosis. BAD endometriosis. It was stage 3 which is one of the higher levels of endometriosis. Knowing what I know now, I realize what a miracle it was that I became pregnant with Harrison and Hazel at all. I consider it a huge blessing that I didn't feel or experience the level of pain that most women feel with this condition.
So, during that surgery, they cleaned out the endometriosis the best they could. My cycles after I had Jeffrey were heavy but not bad, and more regular than they had been for a long time. This would probably explain why I was able to become pregnant with Emmett and had him when Jeffrey was 17 months old.
Well, now things are terrible again. The hormones, the mood swings, the PMS, the bleeding, the cramps, etc... etc... it is awful. Every time my period comes, is not a great thing. It's hard on me, it's hard on my family, and I am always relieved when it goes away again.
We decided that it was time. So I am preparing to have a hysterectomy. I am having it done all laparascopic which I think is pretty cool. The doctor I go to specializes in doing this type of procedure and was trained by one of the best surgeons in the country. He is also very fast. I asked him how long he thought it would take and he told me the hysterectomy portion would probably take an hour.
I know that probably sounds like a long time to people who have never assisted on surgery, but I've assisted on lots of hysterectomies and that's super fast! Even a surgeon who is really good at doing vaginal hysterectomies usually takes 2-2 1/2 hours.
Laparascopic surgeries usually take longer anyway, because they are being done with a scope. So, an hour is pretty amazing.
Of course, I will be having my endometriosis cleaned out as well, so that will probably add another hour to the surgical time.
I feel at peace with it. That among many other things lets me know it is a good choice to make.
I think I wrote previously about how my CMT (charcot-marie-toothe) syndrome is getting worse. I am sure that eventually I will have to get an official diagnosis from a neurologist just to say that yes, it has been scientifically diagnosed, but it is quite obvious that I have an active form of it. I have been trying to keep the muscles I have working, especially in my hands, but my right hand has really been acting up lately. My fingers kind of spasm and wont' move correctly.
That makes me kind of sad, but, oh well. It is something I will have to get used to dealing with.
At least I can always enjoy music with my ears or even memories at the very least.
And with that, here is one of my favorite songs, Absolutely breathtaking, sung by Alfie Boe. I hope you will take the time to listen.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
So Wonderful
I had a doctor appointment yesterday. I was glad that I did for two reasons. The first of course, because it is always good to have a checkup to see how the baby is doing, and the second, because I developed a nasty cold with a fever over the past few days, and I've had some migraines the past couple weeks, so it was good to talk to the doctor about that and know what was "okay" to take and things...
Anyway, since the ultrasound was kind of fuzzy last time, they did another one today, and we saw the baby MOVE! It was so neat and just made me smile. Shane went with me and I looked over at him and he had the cutest happiest look on his face. :)
So, we are sticking with the Sept. 1st due date, and I am almost 15 weeks along. I keep forgetting, and so I started writing it down so I wouldn't forget anymore. (The "how many weeks" thing, because people keep asking me.)
After the ultrasound Dr. Arrington (who is one of the happiest doctors I've ever been to), said to us, "Did I tell you how HAPPY I am that you were able to get pregnant?"
I guess after my surgery he really had his doubts as to whether we would be able to have any more kids (which I already knew), just because of the level of endometriosis that I have. The thing I like about him is that he is able to tell you bad news without making you feel like there is no hope. I remember when he talked to me about the surgery and I didn't feel bad, I was just content with an explanation, and didn't really have any expectations beyond that.
So, this is definitely a miracle baby, and so far it wants to stay here and be with us! Hopefully it will continue. Hazel is SO excited about the baby. She posts every ultrasound picture I get on the fridge and then both the kids usually ask, "do you know if it's a boy or a girl yet?"
Not that I'm not already excited, but to have the rest of my family so excited just makes me happy.
Anyway, since the ultrasound was kind of fuzzy last time, they did another one today, and we saw the baby MOVE! It was so neat and just made me smile. Shane went with me and I looked over at him and he had the cutest happiest look on his face. :)
So, we are sticking with the Sept. 1st due date, and I am almost 15 weeks along. I keep forgetting, and so I started writing it down so I wouldn't forget anymore. (The "how many weeks" thing, because people keep asking me.)
After the ultrasound Dr. Arrington (who is one of the happiest doctors I've ever been to), said to us, "Did I tell you how HAPPY I am that you were able to get pregnant?"
I guess after my surgery he really had his doubts as to whether we would be able to have any more kids (which I already knew), just because of the level of endometriosis that I have. The thing I like about him is that he is able to tell you bad news without making you feel like there is no hope. I remember when he talked to me about the surgery and I didn't feel bad, I was just content with an explanation, and didn't really have any expectations beyond that.
So, this is definitely a miracle baby, and so far it wants to stay here and be with us! Hopefully it will continue. Hazel is SO excited about the baby. She posts every ultrasound picture I get on the fridge and then both the kids usually ask, "do you know if it's a boy or a girl yet?"
Not that I'm not already excited, but to have the rest of my family so excited just makes me happy.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
The Good, The Bad, The Ugly
The Good:
Well, I had my follow-up doctor appointment today, and I learned a lot. First, I relearned and affirmed, that my doctor is amazing. He is very knowledgeable and I asked him a LOT of questions today.
We went over my surgey pictures, and I learned that I am very very blessed to have the two kids that I do. Also that I am very blessed to not have had a lot of pain with endometriosis. There is a possibility that we may have more kids...but it's just a possibility. The scars from the surgery are healing up nicely, in fact, the belly button incision you can't even see anymore! I thought that was pretty cool.
The Bad:
The endometriosis that I have was NOT caused by my c-sections. I have a LOT of endometriosis. A LOT. He told me that normally he is more agressive in getting rid of the endometrial tissue but because we want to have more kids, he put preserving my ability to get pregnant as a top priority. He did tell me that eventually it will need to be taken care of, but unless I get more pain, or horrible bleeding, that we should be able to wait until we are ready to have it done.
The UGLY:
There are some bad patches of endometrial tissue. The fallopian tubes and ovaries are badly affected. The fallopian tubes are clear, but the endometriosis appears to go through the outer wall of the fallopian tube. Same with the ovaries. So, eventually I will need to have it all taken out. When that happens the areas of endometriosis next to the fallopian tubes and ovaries need to be taken care of too.
I told my doctor that while it would be wonderful to find out I was pregnant, I am at peace with the fact that it may never happen. Yes, I still have my up and down days. Yes there are times when I wonder why. More often though, I find myself content with the fact that I have tried, had the desire, and pretty much that is all I can do. More and more often lately I find myself wondering if we really do want to have more kids. ; ) I find that "want" doesn't really adequately describe my emotion. I really do feel like it would be a blessing if we were able to have more, but also realize that we have been richly blessed to have the two that we do.
Well, I had my follow-up doctor appointment today, and I learned a lot. First, I relearned and affirmed, that my doctor is amazing. He is very knowledgeable and I asked him a LOT of questions today.
We went over my surgey pictures, and I learned that I am very very blessed to have the two kids that I do. Also that I am very blessed to not have had a lot of pain with endometriosis. There is a possibility that we may have more kids...but it's just a possibility. The scars from the surgery are healing up nicely, in fact, the belly button incision you can't even see anymore! I thought that was pretty cool.
The Bad:
The endometriosis that I have was NOT caused by my c-sections. I have a LOT of endometriosis. A LOT. He told me that normally he is more agressive in getting rid of the endometrial tissue but because we want to have more kids, he put preserving my ability to get pregnant as a top priority. He did tell me that eventually it will need to be taken care of, but unless I get more pain, or horrible bleeding, that we should be able to wait until we are ready to have it done.
The UGLY:
There are some bad patches of endometrial tissue. The fallopian tubes and ovaries are badly affected. The fallopian tubes are clear, but the endometriosis appears to go through the outer wall of the fallopian tube. Same with the ovaries. So, eventually I will need to have it all taken out. When that happens the areas of endometriosis next to the fallopian tubes and ovaries need to be taken care of too.
I told my doctor that while it would be wonderful to find out I was pregnant, I am at peace with the fact that it may never happen. Yes, I still have my up and down days. Yes there are times when I wonder why. More often though, I find myself content with the fact that I have tried, had the desire, and pretty much that is all I can do. More and more often lately I find myself wondering if we really do want to have more kids. ; ) I find that "want" doesn't really adequately describe my emotion. I really do feel like it would be a blessing if we were able to have more, but also realize that we have been richly blessed to have the two that we do.
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