Well, right now is just one of those times when life is hard for me. It's really frustrating. That is probably why I haven't been writing much on my blog, I mean, who wants to read about me whining and complaining about life, right?
I'm frustrated, and sad, and well, quite frankly, depressed. I have a new challenge right now, and it is NOT going well. I feel like when I take a step up I just get pushed back down. I was getting to such a happy place. I felt like I had finally reached a point where things were going okay, and I was beginning to make a difference. I had reached a level of peace and understanding about the whole infertility thing, and I was feeling really good about being in Young Women's. Then, bam! That's taken away, and here I am at ground zero. I've been here for about three weeks now. Has it really only been three weeks? Man...
It would be really easy at this point to just take the easy road, and say, Hey, you know what? I quit. Get someone else to babysit the 10 and 11 year old class because I just don't feel like it and I'm done. But, that's not the way I am. Surely there is a lesson in there somewhere for me...I don't know what it is, and maybe I won't learn it, but I hope I can survive long enough to know that I have at least tried my best.
4 comments:
primary can definitely be challenging! but i always tell myself that someone has to do it and i guess its my turn (for YEARS now). i am actually happy in primary now (nursery) but was MISERABLE for a while. it didnt help that EVERY member of the primary pregnancy was pregnant at the same time AND I WASNT!!
I'm so sorry it sucks for you right now. I hated primary at first too. I was so mad because my BF in the ward was the primary president... and I told her NEVER to put my name on the list for teachers... and she did anyway.
I was so angry and upset. I missed my old calling (Gospel Doctrine teacher). I was teaching the six year olds and they were out of control. I had no idea how to handle them.
It got so much better though! I bought the books at Deseret Book that go along with each lesson and started doing cool handouts each week for the lesson. It made me feel like I was making an effort. The kids responded so well and loved it.
It definitely took some time. I have never been in YW's but I know lots of women who have and HATED when they got released. It's apparently the most AMAZING calling and I'm sorry you don't have it anymore. But I know Heavenly Father trusts you enough to allow you to mold the up and coming YM and YW in primary. It's a huge responsibility and I know you can do it.
I love you!
I think you are wonderful. Thanks for sharing your joys and your heartaches.
Hang in there Melissa! Speaking as our wards current Primary President, I sure appreciate all those who work in primary! It can be so challenging at times and yet so rewarding! You will do great!
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